Hi, my name is Dani.\u00a0 I prosecute domestic violence cases for a living.\u00a0 Awkward introduction, I know, but my job is the icebreaker at every party.\u00a0 And, it is a guaranteed conversation starter.<\/p>\n

I spent two weeks in Zambia during the summer of 2011.\u00a0 While I was there, I taught counselors, prosecutors, police officers and teachers about domestic violence and child abuse.\u00a0 We also explored how to interview children and the behavior changes that might happen when a child has been abused.\u00a0 My class learned that, in America, we have many of the same problems with Domestic Violence that Zambia does.<\/p>\n

They also learned that American women and children are abused as much as they are (Sorry, guys, I\u2019m a prosecutor, 99% of my cases involve women and children as victims.\u00a0 Men can be victims, but it is rare).\u00a0 Despite the cultural differences, they were able to take away a lot from the seminars to help them in their lives.<\/p>\n

Just before Monna asked me to write for her blog, my friends in Zambia sent me a story about a young girl at the school there.\u00a0 She became withdrawn at school and then stopped attending.\u00a0 Through counseling, they discovered that she was raped.<\/p>\n

Despite the cultural stigma around people who go forward with cases in court there, especially against family members, my friends stood with her and helped her through the process.\u00a0 She attended the hearings and was even able to move away from her abuser for her safety.<\/p>\n

The story made my day!\u00a0 To hear that the training I gave – which was training I received and honestly took for granted initially – was used to help seek justice for a girl who had been violated?? Wow.<\/p>\n

When I tell people what I do for a living, I usually get a response that includes a pained look and an \u201cI\u2019m sorry\u201d or \u201cHow do you do that?\u201d\u00a0 When I tell them I love what I do, the response is \u201cI could never do that.\u201d<\/p>\n

Relationships are messy and they are even more so when there is abuse involved.\u00a0 I talk to victims who have very volatile relationships and emotions.\u00a0 More times than not, I get yelled at on the phone or I am told that I am ruining a life.<\/p>\n

But, the one thing I try to tell each person is this,\u00a0\u201cYou are valuable.\u00a0 This is not your fault.\u00a0 And, you DO NOT deserve this.\u201d\u00a0 No one does.<\/strong><\/p>\n

<\/strong>Don’t buy into the myths, though.\u00a0 Those victims come from all walks of life, all economic statuses, and all ages. Domestic violence does not play favorites.\u00a0 Victims are not just poor, homeless, the uneducated or drug addicts.\u00a0 They are young, educated, successful people who get in a relationship where the abuser has so much power and control that they have no way out.\u00a0 No friends.\u00a0 No family to support them.\u00a0 No stability outside the relationship.<\/p>\n

Everyone wants to blame the victim for staying in the relationship.\u00a0 But it is more complicated than most people realize. With children it is even harder.\u00a0 Children cannot protect themselves, and sometimes the parents do not protect either.<\/p>\n

At the end of the day, sometimes the only way to help is to be the \u201cbad guy.\u201d\u00a0 I am willing to do that.\u00a0 I do not have an easy job.\u00a0 Most days it is painful to read what people do to each other while saying \u201cI love you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Yet, I love the work I do.\u00a0 I help give people a voice.\u00a0 I help protect children when their parents refuse to protect them.\u00a0 I stand up for victims even when they are convinced they do not want someone to stand up for them.<\/p>\n

And, at the end of the day, I go home to my son, give him hugs and kisses, and remind him that he is loved, valued and special.\u00a0 Everyone deserves to hear that, even a baby.<\/p>\n

Danalyn Savage known by her friends as \u201cDani\u201d. \u00a0Dani, an attorney who specializes in domestic violence, is married to Scott, who gives leadership to North Phoenix Baptist Church\u2019s Young Adult Ministry. A native of western New York, Dani loves making and canning jam, watching hockey and introducing joy into the lives of her friends.<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

Break the silence with us and share this story!<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Don’t miss the conversation at the OM Cafe. Sign up for email updates. It’s free and we always respect your privacy.\u00a0<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

YTo3OntzOjk6IndpZGdldF9pZCI7czoyMDoid3lzaWphLW5sLTEzNTAwNjcxMTgiO3M6NToibGlzdHMiO2E6MTp7aTowO3M6MToiMSI7fXM6MTA6Imxpc3RzX25hbWUiO2E6MTp7aToxO3M6MTM6Ik15IGZpcnN0IGxpc3QiO31zOjEyOiJhdXRvcmVnaXN0ZXIiO3M6MTc6Im5vdF9hdXRvX3JlZ2lzdGVyIjtzOjEyOiJsYWJlbHN3aXRoaW4iO3M6MTM6ImxhYmVsc193aXRoaW4iO3M6Njoic3VibWl0IjtzOjEwOiJTdWJzY3JpYmUhIjtzOjc6InN1Y2Nlc3MiO3M6NTA6IkNoZWNrIHlvdXIgaW5ib3ggbm93IHRvIGNvbmZpcm0geW91ciBzdWJzY3JpcHRpb24uIjt9<\/div>\n
<\/p>\n
Read Hope’s story of courage and healing.<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
This is a guest post by my friend, Danalyn Savage. Hi, my name is Dani.\u00a0 I prosecute domestic violence cases for a living.\u00a0 Awkward introduction, I know, but my job…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[272],"tags":[292,312,319],"class_list":["post-3079","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-domestic-violence","tag-domestic-abuse","tag-dvam","tag-prosecutor"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1GpYg-NF","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.organicmamacafe.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3079","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.organicmamacafe.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.organicmamacafe.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.organicmamacafe.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.organicmamacafe.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3079"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.organicmamacafe.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3079\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3081,"href":"https:\/\/www.organicmamacafe.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3079\/revisions\/3081"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.organicmamacafe.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3079"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.organicmamacafe.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3079"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.organicmamacafe.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3079"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}